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Social Transition Resources

Guide on Coming Out to Family, Friends, and Colleagues

Jamie

— 2 min read
Guide on Coming Out to Family, Friends, and Colleagues

Coming out as transgender can be a significant and personal journey. This guide aims to provide helpful information and support for those considering coming out to family, friends, and colleagues. 

Remember, coming out is a personal journey, and it's important to proceed at your own pace while ensuring you have a strong support system in place.

Preparing to Come Out

Self-Reflection and Support

Before coming out, it's essential to:

  1. Ensure you feel ready and confident in your identity
  2. Build a support system of trusted individuals or resources
  3. Educate yourself about transgender experiences and terminology

Planning Your Approach

Consider the following:

  • Who you want to tell first
  • The best time and place for the conversation
  • How you want to communicate (in person, letter, video call, etc.)
  • What specific information you want to share

Coming Out to Family and Friends

Choosing Your Moment

  • Select a time when the person you're telling isn't stressed or preoccupied
  • Ensure you have enough time for an unrushed conversation

During the Conversation

  • Be clear and direct about your identity
  • Share resources to help them understand (e.g., PFLAG, The Trevor Project)
  • Be prepared for various reactions and questions

After Coming Out

  • Give people time to process the information
  • Maintain open communication and be willing to answer questions
  • Seek support from your established network if needed

Coming Out at Work

Assessing Your Workplace

  • Research your company's LGBTQ+ policies and resources
  • Consider speaking with HR or a trusted manager first

Approaches to Coming Out at Work

  • Formal approach: Discuss with HR or management to ensure proper support         and confidentiality
  • Casual approach: Incorporate your identity naturally into conversations

Creating a Supportive Work Environment

  • Request that colleagues use your correct name and pronouns
  • Advocate for inclusive policies if they're not already in place

Community Support & Resources

Coming out as transgender can be a significant step, and there are numerous resources available to support you through this process. Here are some helpful resources:

Support Organizations

  • The Trevor Project offers a 24/7/365 Lifeline (866-488-7386), TrevorChat for online instant messaging, and TrevorText for text-based support. They also provide TrevorSpace, a global peer support network.
  • Trans Lifeline (877-565-8860) is a crisis hotline specifically for transgender individuals.
  • PFLAG has local chapters that provide support for LGBTQ+ individuals and their families.

Educational Materials

  • Transgender Map: An informational site created by Andrea James, covering topics such as gender transition, support resources, and financing transitions.

Health Resources

Read more